Help your child deal with failure in the right way.
When babies are learning to walk, they fall (or fail) many times over. Babies need to repeat the process (of learning to walk) over and over again until they get it right and are able to move on to greater movement such as running, jumping and skipping. According to Cindy Glass, Owner and Founder of Step Up Education Centres, “These ‘failures’ are normal and natural processes in the act of learning to walk. In fact, they are expected and hailed as signs of effort and future success!”
She adds that as we grow older, our fear of failing and falling down tends to slow our progress and in some cases, even stop it altogether.
Glass said, “Children who ‘fail’ a grade, for example, often feel humiliated, ashamed, embarrassed and depressed. Their self-worth plummets and they often find it difficult to accept the fact that they will not be moving up to a new grade with their classmates.”
Parents, too, struggle with a ‘failed’ grade as, so often, they see it as an indictment on their parenting.
If your child is repeating a grade in 2019, Glass provides the following tips to help him/her in understanding and embracing the gift of being given an opportunity to learn more effectively:
- There is no such thing as failing a grade. It is time to speak a different language. Your child has not yet mastered the building blocks needed to move on to a new grade. He/she is being given an opportunity to repeat a grade in order to master these important skills
- Address the elephant in the room through open and honest communication. Speak to your child about them having to repeat the grade. Find out how they feel and what they will need from you in order to move forward with a positive outlook. Non-judgmental conversations are essential at this time
- Help your child to own and embrace the repeat. Help them to see it as a learning opportunity. Senior learners who may not have worked to their potential (resulting in having to repeat) need to identify and own the mistakes that they had made and look to the future knowing that they can and must make better choices for themselves
- Extra tuition at this time is highly recommended. Choose an environment that focuses on building self-esteem and emotional intelligence skills as well as academic skill
- Teach your child that they are not less of a person for having to repeat their grade – they have simply taken a different path to their classmates. Keeping your child’s self-esteem intact while still teaching them to take responsibility for their learning is going to be your biggest challenge as a parent.
“Having to repeat the grade can be a tough experience for parents and learners, but it need not be the end of the world. You are your child’s greatest teacher. How you choose to move forward will set the tone for how well your child is able to adapt to the situation,